


Salt Water

by hungrybookworm



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Fresh Starts, Hope this is vague enough for the anime fans again, Loss, M/M, Paperwork, Spoilers for Chapter 345, will probably be jossed by next week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2018-02-06 12:00:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1857258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hungrybookworm/pseuds/hungrybookworm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gon starts anew, and yet he knows he's missing something.</p>
<p>Written straight after reading Chapter 345.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Salt Water

Gon began staying up late. His pile of paperwork stayed tall and foreboding, and thick textbooks turned his desk into a small fortress. A moth bumped into the overhead light bulb again and again. Outside the midnight waves sighed, and the open window brought in the smell of brine.

He left Whale Island over a year ago for York Shin, and for his hunter exam nearly two years ago. But sometimes, Gon wondered if he’d even left at all.

He put down his pen and stretched, then glanced at the clock balanced on a maths workbook. It flashed two in the morning. At this rate he might catch up with school work in a month, and maybe get through the whole pile in three. Then he could... do what? He still wasn’t sure about that. 

He opened his hands, and stared at his palms. They were white and soft in the dim light, like a normal schoolboy’s. All the scars and calluses from his journey were gone; Alluka wiped them away when she revived him, along with the bruises, the aches, the muscle.

Sometimes Gon wondered if it’d all been a bad dream.

He reached for a glass of water, only to find it empty. He got up and left the room, meaning to refill it. Aunt Mito and his Great-Grandma had long gone to bed, and the sea sounded quieter from the hallway. It could have been any year, any season. He could’ve been seven years old, dressed in pyjamas sneaking down for a midnight snack. 

Gon crept downstairs and moved through the living room. He caught sight of Ging’s photo on the side. The photograph used to be the only reference he had for his father’s appearance, but now he’d seen his dad in the flesh. In a way the picture had lost its lustre, but in another way it gave him warm nostalgia.

A dull pain ran through his chest, and for a moment, Gon was overwhelmed with the sense that something was missing. He shook his head, trying to ignore it. 

He reached the kitchen and stepped up to the sink. The tap water felt refreshing against his hand. Ever since he caught a ship back to Whale Island, and felt the cool sea breeze blow through his hair on deck, he found himself turning around, looking over his shoulder. These days he always felt restless and fidgety, and the sensation got worse when he was alone. The paperwork was a good distraction.

At first he assumed it was because he had met Ging. He’d accomplished his goal, all was well. He didn’t have to fight for anything anymore. It wasn’t until he arrived back home that it hit him. The joystation. The way his room was arranged to fit two beds instead of one. Aunt Mito’s questions about his adventures. Some mornings Gon would wake up and glance around through half open eyes, expecting Killua to be up and about, or still lying half asleep on the floor.

His skin had been wiped clean of their memories, but the tiny differences gave everything away.

Where was Killua now? Gon turned the tap off, and brought the glass to his mouth. They could contact each other easily enough, but over the last few days Killua’s phone went to voicemail, and his emails bounced back with a message about them visiting somewhere off the grid. He honestly had no idea Killua had a sister until recently, and in a way it felt unfair. He was unconscious when they reunited, and by the time he woke up, Killua was already smiling sadly, looking the other way.

And Gon, giddy over seeing Ging, over finally meeting his famous father, didn’t realise just how much his absence hurt until he was on that ship’s deck, the spray dotting his cheeks like tears and his backpack light with his own luggage.

Gon’s words had left scars on his own heart, and not even Alluka could wash those away. He climbed back up to his room, taking care not to spill his drink. Killua would probably never forgive him, and he was fine with that. Gon wasn’t sure if he could forgive himself. Outside the crickets chirped, and Gon, impulsively, pressed the cold glass of water against his forehead.

One day, he wasn’t sure when, but one day they would meet again. And when they did, maybe Gon could be whole again, and look straight ahead at the future.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as soon as I finished reading Chapter 345 (which was yesterday, yikes!). I just had the crazy urge to write about Gon doing all that paperwork and missing Killua. I'd wanted to do a post-Alluka thing from Gon's point of view for a while, so this was convenient timing! It'll probably be incompatible with canon by next week, but hey!
> 
> Ahh, my theory that there'd be a time skip was totally wrong, hahaha. I'm fine with the current arc focusing on Leorio and Kurapika though! More than fine, in fact (I missed those two)! Also Pariston/Ging holy crap yes. Gimme.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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